Dehydration of the Soul

When the body is dehydrated, lacking water and nutrients needed to survive, something triggers in the brain to let the body know that it needs replenishing. Suddenly you have a great thirst that you need to quench. You try everything from water to Gatorade in hopes to quench the desire to rehydrate. If you're in tune with your body, you might need some water to replenish what has been lost, but if you fight and ignore the signals of dehydration the body will develop an extreme thirst, tiredness and loss of ability to function normally. The same goes for our spirit.
No matter your rank in your walk with God, no one is exempt from dehydration of the soul. I have been raised in church my entire life, and I have made detours every now and then and found my way back, but my biggest mistake yet is that I have abandoned the desire to refresh my soul.
Recently I have seen behavior that is "unPentecostal-like". I use that term in the same way that society uses "ladylike". There is a general understanding of what that means and we know how to adjust accordingly. As a female, when I spit or burp, I am being "unladylike", therefore when I stop those behaviors I am now acting like a lady. I see it the same way with being Pentecostal. Within the UPC circuit there is an acceptable way to and not to act because we have a common goal that we are trying to reach: to show the love, mercy and the hope of Christ.
My dehydration is strictly my own fault. I had a Pastor, a leader that I have so much respect for, say that it is not the only the preacher's responsibility to feed me, but that I must be mature enough to feed myself through prayer and the Word. When I become distraught and my leader is not able to help me, I must be strong enough to withstand the storm, but how can I resist the world if my soul lacks the ability to function without the hydrating downpour of the Holy Ghost?
I have allowed my soul to become calloused and dry because of a few people's decisions to have a lack of leadership and display disrespect in the House of God. Where there is no room for a lack of leadership, spiritual guidance and disrespect, there is also no room for a dry, lifeless soul. It is my responsibility to take care of me. I must find the water to to nourish my soul, to replenish what I have lost. I sincerely hope that God is put back into leadership, but I cannot allow someone else's behavior to lead me to the dry depths of despair. My soul cries out for rain, the down pouring of the Spirit.
It is never wise to continue running when you are thirsty. Listen to your soul, God gave us desire to know when we need replenishing. Listen, follow and obey the signals of dehydration and extreme weakness and functionality will not be the concern at hand, but the continuous work of God and outreach to the world who has never felt the sweet refreshing love of Jesus.